night has fallen
hearts are beating
paranoid minds are reeling
sitting in my room so safe
thinking the violence
being placed on a sacred soul
little kids , screaming silently
for our system to save them
a brutal robbery , shots fired
no hope for intruder to be found
violence , struggle for paper
all for printed paper we foolishly
place value to , more value than life
more value than friendships
I am true , I value me and you
I would like all to know , I am a recovering addict . I was at my group meeting Friday talking to the group about my blogging and writing . The first thing brought up was ( if I was portraying myself right ) I think I have anyways I’m coming clean for the most part. I have been addicted to several drugs , abusing many just a few short months ago . I had a seizure in an attempt to end my life . Well that kinda backfired …so I rose up and walked away from my whole life . I came back to upstate N Y and enrolled in recovery . I quit smoking cigarettes one month to the day after leaving drugs behind … I am now currently in out patient recovery and doing well . I feel ashamed at myself for the things I’ve done , I fight this thing everyday . I thank you all for being here … Tim
June 18, 2012 at 11:31 pm
Reblogged this on timzauto.
June 18, 2012 at 11:46 pm
There’s no shame in where you are Tim. Every one of us has something, and you’re doing what you need to do. Think about Paul in the Bible…he was a horrible, murderous man, and became one of the most beloved Biblical figures. Also…you have been honest as far as I’ve been able to tell. I knew from the beginning of seeing you on here that you’re a recovering addict. :) As my friend Stephen would say on here, “Be encouraged!” :)
June 19, 2012 at 12:41 am
I attended 12 step for seven years; I was codependent, raised in addictive household..etc…I found the very best friends and supports in those rooms. I have a short story on my blog about the first meeting. If you want, I’ll find the day for you on my blog I posted that. Anyhow, I applaud you! You are on the right track, and only good things will come from the support and companionship of those that know your story.
June 19, 2012 at 12:47 am
Thank you ….:)
June 19, 2012 at 4:08 pm
You’ve learned so much over time and during your recovery, and have worked very hard to get to where you are now. You have an amazing amount of discipline and still gaining strength and faith every day, and finally learning to love yourself again, which is beautiful! You’ve dealt with such painful things from the past, and shouldn’t be ashamed any longer, but be able to look back on them and be proud that you’ve learned from it and risen above it. You have so many things to be proud of yourself for, so many accomplishments that they should overshadow those things from the past. I have to say, I’m proud of you beyond words. As far as portraying yourself correctly, in my opinion, you do. You’ve always been very forthcoming with everyone about what you’re going through. I’ve actually seen you touch on some of the emotions you deal with in your poems, which is great. Writing is such a positive and healthy outlet, you have a natural talent for it, and hope you continue.
June 19, 2012 at 6:48 pm
Thanks for the kind words ….:)