The other week-end I gave my Pop (dad) a pedicure. At almost 86, he has trouble bending down to tend to his feet.
I slowly removed his sandals and sat beside him on a small stool. He was worried that I would hurt my back by sitting this way….
Yours nails I cut carefully
and removed old skin
then massaged cream gently
along each of your feet
You thanked me for what you called a
‘laborious task’, to me it gave
me joy
to help see to the feet of my
father who was once a
little boy
My Dad
As I massaged the cream
into your skin
I thought of where
your feet had been
These feet that were bare and told to stand in snow in a European Winter.
These feet that walked to the timber pile to chop wood for your step – father, the fire you were not allowed to be warmed by.
These feet that had to walk up the staircase where you were told to eat your meal, alone, whilst the rest of the family ate downstairs in comfort at the table.
These feet that gave you the strength to escape from Czechoslavakia during the War, to cross mountains, hide on trains, trudge through forests, swim through rivers and nearly have your life ended twice by a gun held at you by the KGB.
These feet that brought you to Australia, to start a new life, to build a house for a family that you knew you would one day have, though you had no carpentry skills.
These feet that ran and played shuttlecock with us, the times that we went camping.
These feet that walked next to me on the day that I was wed.
These feet now older
that hold your struggling
legs and body
these feet are not a ‘laborious chore’
to me, my father
These feet have travelled many miles
through great adversity
saw you start a business
accomplish many things
I shall tend to your feet
as I love you
I shall tend again, again
and again
I have a drug inside me
coursing through my veins
not a little coloured pill
a drug
not herbal or manufactured
yet makes my skin glow
relieves my aches and pains
a drug
that makes me
euphoric intoxicated
not held within a glass
a drug
that relaxes and calms
that is not injected or smoked
a drug
that isn’t prescription
that gives me a high and
brings me comfort
a drug
not administered
intravenously yet supplies
energy and sustenance
a drug
that helps me sleep
peacefully through the night
which isn’t a sedative
a drug
that steadies my moods
keeps me on track
that isn’t a vitamin
a drug
that helps when my head pounds
which isn’t an aspirin
a drug
that stimulates
which isn’t a white powder
a drug inside me
coursing through my veins
a drug simply intoxicating
that drug is labelled YOU
Overweight, my foot steps are
heavy across the ground
its bitter and snow covers all around
but I am inside safe and warm
I need the rest to have a break
can’t control the food that I intake
I’m tired it’s been a hard cold year
but it’s not the tiredness that I fear
I want to shut away the world
be quiet left alone nothing to disturb
no one to listen should I moan
food is my only comfort my
self pleasure and my need
don’t judge me for what I am
don’t tsk or shake your head
for you do not know the real me
I’ve struggled this whole fall
my home my sanctuary far away
from staring eyes who think me
a disgrace people are so quick to surmise
why they think I am obese they do not know the
emptiness nor the struggles that I’ve faced
no they just seem frightened do they think perhaps I’m bad
or ashamed because of my size which truly makes me sad
No no-one hasn’t got a clue
they naturally walk the other way
not willing to get to know me
or how I feel today they look in my
direction but simply scamper by
not willing to come near me due only to my size
fear in their eyes they look upon me with abomination
but I am simply a grizzly bear ready for hibernation
And do not let the cynics say that health
is not a treasure tied with gold, your wealth.
So I went to the doctor yesterday, and he gave me lots more stuff to take. The cough is already more shallow, not so deep, not so frequent, not so painful. I even cleaned one of the bathrooms when I got up this morning, so energy must be returning. I am not, however, going to overdo it. I will finish packing for leaving on our trip on Sun. without stressing too much. Going backward with this would be horrible.
I’ve missed 20 Lines, and will try to do a bit of writing before we leave. If that doesn’t happen, though, it will only be because I’m conserving time and energy, and putting it into things I absolutely have to do.
It’s amazing, once I begin feeling even the slightest bit better, how feeling as miserable as I did fades into recent memory.
It’s snowing a gentle pretty snow, and is not supposed to get bad enough to affect travel on Sun. So now I’m looking forward to the trip we had to postpone and having Christmas with my brother and his family.
Well, hello again. I’m sorry for my long absence. I’ve been sick for almost a month now and just today am having my first decent day. I guess it’s “going around,” this deep barking hacking cough, pain on swallowing, and all the awful symptoms of flu and bronchitis.
My husband got it over the weekend. We had to cancel our travel plans to North Carolina to see my brother and his family for eight days, however we have rearranged our plans to leave this coming Sunday, and will be home on Jan. 6.
It’s so aggravating to feel this miserable, not be able to participate at all in Christmas festivities, and just hang around the house sleeping and napping and taking medicines and moping and wishing we felt better.
My husband was better on Mon., but this cough of mine is stubborn and has held on tightly. I have an appointment with a pulmonologist tomorrow, and am actually feeling better today, back to the land of the living. So I wanted to pop onto 20 Lines to at least say “hi.”
Hi. : )
Well we headed out on a mission
JT was excited to get going
She stood still as I got her collar on, as well as her Red scarf
We told her to go out to the truck and she sat beside her door
It is just a 10 minute ride and I could not wait to go see what the lake
looked like
Yes it was in the yard as it always is at draw down. I am so tired of
losing the land I pay so much for in taxes , as well as all the work I do to make the lower area
just as pretty as the upper yard
So today JT and I set out on a mission and you will see lots of photos in days to come
I will post most on Living and Lovin and 20 lines Facebook page
Follow along if you have time
Eunice
How I Feel About December 2006 (Photo credit: cobalt123)
December is my favorite time of year
full snowing skies with the sight of deer
the hustle and bustle of stores and streets
to decorated windows and nice warming treats
the air is filled with anticipation and hope
sledders are searching for their favorite slope
December is my favorite time of year
soon on the 25th Saint Nick will appear
bringing all children of the world his great joy
the luckiest of ones receive a nice toy
December is here for 31 days
for me it just continues to amaze
Hi
Well for those of us here in America we had Thanksgiving on Thursday then left overs over and over so if I am
going to have a good weigh-in come Tuesday :) this will be what my meals will look like. Not such a bad deal
but I can only eat lettuce just so much. I better be good if I want to get back to that "ABOUT" photo of ME…
morning air
is what I need
this restless life
I want to bleed
mind is stuck
to past events
when all I have
is good intents
futures bleak
as I can see
sometimes I wish
I wasn’t me
that’s when
I look up to the sky
I pray to Jesus
and ask him why
looking for
an answer soon
for depressed in life
Corcovado jesus (Photo credit: @Doug88888)
I’m not immune
I am insecure.
I hear your cry. So am I -
and every writer?
Related posts:
http://patwoodblogging.wordpress.com/
http://alexjcavanaugh.blogspot.co.uk/p/the-insecure-writers-support-group.html
I called, but there was no one home. Left a message after the tone.
I waited for what seemed like hours then called again to your empty house,
repeated the message and called again. No one answered. Where was my friend?
I tried to eat, I tried to sleep and from the phone there was no peep.
They sit with me, but don’t understand; it’s not enough to hold my hand.
It’s not enough without you here. It’s not enough to shed a tear.
Tears are cheap and I have none for without you my life is done.
I’ve become an insomniac just waiting for you to come back.
It’s not your fault – I know you can’t, no matter how many times I chant,
no matter how many times I lift the phone and leave the message after the tone.
I do it now just to hear your voice. I do it now because I have no choice.
What are you doing with that little square thing?
I saw you put my face in there before.
Why does it flash so – what are you doing?
You’re beginning to make my eyes quite sore.
What is that wool thing and can I eat it?
No, don’t wrap me up. I can’t feel my toes.
With too many clothes I’m overheated.
I won’t need a coat like that till it snows.
I’m beginning to dream of when I’m big
and I will be able to speak my mind
and tell you the foods that make me feel sick
and all of the stuff I’ve got on my mind.
But all I can do right now is to dream
And when you get it right, give you a beam.
