Tag Archives: humor
5 Liners – A Round
Brain.
Thinking machine
Not working today.
Busy week end, tired.
Sleep.
Sleep.
Refresh me.
Not working today.
Too much to do.
Work.
Work.
Exhibition coming.
Not working today.
Running around in circles.
Stop.
Stop.
Do nothing?
Not working today?
Need off switch for
Brain.
A Bowl of Soup
I wish I had a bowl of soup
Alas, but I do not.
But if I had a bowl of soup
I’d like it nice and hot
~~~
But not too hot, just warm enough
To soothe my throat so sore
And if the soup was good enough
I might just ask for more
~~~
But since I have no bowl of soup
I’ll make a cup of tea
The herbal kind with lemon
And delightful, sweet honey
~~~
I hope you like this little poem
Though it’s not some great verse
Remember, while it’s not the best
I’ve penned, by far, much worse.
;)
The Crocotiggersaurous
Apologies if you’ve seen this before, but I was reminded of it by a small person and thought I would share it again.
Reblogged from http://patwoodblogging.wordpress.com/2012/08/23/the-crocotiggersaurus
I have a special pet
Her name is Harriet
And I found her in a wood some time ago.
She’s been with me for a while
And she really makes me smile
She’s a Crocotiggersaurous with one toe.
When I found her she was small
But now she’s grown quite tall.
To get her in my bedroom is a squee-eeeze.
Her head is very wide
So she turns it on its side
And crawls in through the door upon her knees.
She eats breakfast lunch and tea
Pretty much the same as me
Though she doesn’t like fish fingers (and I do).
She wears daddy’s ancient shirts,
My mummy’s jeans and skirts
And one single lace-up pointy big black shoe.
She can’t come to school with us
So she kicks up quite a fuss
Till mummy has to give her nose a blow.
She is waiting after school
With skipping rope and bat and ball
And we play games until my friends all have to go.
And when it’s time to go to sleep
We snuggle down inside the sheets
And we cuddle and she rocks me to and fro.
She cuddles very tight
And she keeps me safe all night.
She’s my Crocotiggersaurous with one toe.
The writing process haiku
Write it and leave it.
Read it. Revise it. Read it
and tear out my hair.
Bald, revise it more.
Edit, edit and edit.
Send out. Buy a wig.
Writing Garb – Haiku
Life in a T-shirt,
pyjama bottoms or jeans,
hair tied in a band.
OVID says…
Since I’ve been talking of and showing art, plus poetry, I thought I’d leave you with a quote from Ovid -
Of its own accord my song would come in the right
rhythms, and what I was trying to say was poetry.
Well lucky Ovid!
Sometimes my ‘song’ comes in the night,
and sometimes rhymes,
but mostly if it comes out right …
the rhyme marches in thyme
internally
[006] Limericks
When I’m not dreaming, I write. And when I’m not writing or dreaming, I wake up and go to school. These limericks are the results of me drifting off in English class.
Now Mike, don’t you dare spill that beer,
For if you do, laddie, I fear
I’ll leap off this here stool
And lap up the pool
Like I done at your wedding last year!
Eight syllables are in this line.
Some critics will try to divine
A method to meter
They think to be neater
Than a beat-count that ought not be nine.
The was an old rotter from Cork
Whose beard had a terrible fork -
One day he did cough
like a great raspy chough
And out fell a whole leg of pork.
There once was a man named Fitzhugh
Who wore many a steel-toed shoe.
From behind he did spy
A stalker-like guy;
With shoe, he beat him black and blue.
On the street I once talked with a bum
Who, nearly about to succumb,
Said, “Why don’t you all see?
That uncertainty
Of taxes is really quite dumb!”
Sometimes in Lit class I’m ignored,
So then I don’t draw on the board
But write limericks
To quick get a fix
Of a writing style rather abhorred.
My Brain (A Rispetto Challenge)
If you’d like to try a Rispetto, here are the rules. Shadow Poetry – Rispetto
Here’s my effort, with a bit of frustration and a bit of humor. :)
My Brain (A Rispetto)
It seems that my brain has a mind of its own
Won’t do what I tell it, as hard as I try
The thoughts just keep coming, won’t leave me alone
I’m trying to focus, it leads me to sigh
~~~
I’m needing to study, and did just a bit
The dumb doorbell rang, and I said, “Oh, I quit!”
I’ll sit here a moment and take a deep breath
And then get back to it, though it be my death!
Lizzie the Lizard
This is from SwittersB‘s suggestion on my Name That Abstract Challenge. :) The last one, “Heartbreak”, I forgot to mention in that post, was from nutsfortreasure‘s suggestion. Sorry about that, Eunice! The links are both going under this week’s Poetry Challenge. I’m looking forward to seeing some poems from all y’all! :)
Lizzie the Lizard is chasing her tail
Watching it fly, and through the air sail
If Lizzie should catch it, oh how she will wail!
One Big Mess (More Shades of Seuss)
I do not like a hurricane
A hurricane is just a pain
A hurricane is one big mess
Of windy, gusty, blowing rain
~~~
Now Isaac wants to come our way
It may be here by late Tuesday
I don’t like Isaac, I confess
I wish he would just go away
!!!
I hope that I’m not sounding rude
But hope we have enough canned food
I cannot find the flashlights yet
If we can’t find them, that’s not good
###
Okay, so ‘good’ did not quite rhyme
So shoot me, was it such a crime?
I am not perfect, though I try
At least not perfect all the time
^^^
I think that I will shut my mouth
This conversation’s going south
I wish the storm was going there
Instead of coming to my houth…HOUSE…HOUSE!
Shades of Seuss
(Wrote this quick poem this morning and read it to my daughter, who said it was very ‘Dr. Seuss like’. :) I like that! Tee hee!)
Shades of Seuss
I cannot be another me
The only me’s the one you see
I wouldn’t even want to be
‘Cause that would mean that I’m not free
Not free to just be who I am
Sometimes a nut, sometimes a ham
Sometimes stuck in a sticky jam
But always me…yes sir, yes ma’am
Yes ma’am, yes sir, it’s a safe bet
Tomorrow I’ll have not changed yet
The same applies to you, my pet
You are the only you I’ve met.
Hyper Vigilance in Repose (Penny the Cat)
Penny the Cat is ever vigilant. Many hours a day she stares out the windows watching the movements of all manner of life’s twitterings outside. She meows, paces, cants her head this way and that. If she snoozes, it is out of my sight.
So, the other day, I had my camera in hand and there was Penny upside down, spread out, asleep atop a chair. I approached. She snoozed. Odd. I took a dozen pictures. She yawned, she stretched, she licked her paw, she gazed at me through half open eyes. Penny hadn’t a care in the world. The world was moving along outside without her. A very rare who cares moment from Penny.
What?
Penny Mid-Yawn. Those piercing teeth clearly visible. A little tartar buildup it appears. The hair on the chair makes it evident this is where Penny sometimes lays her head. Vacuuming is in order. Isn’t a good lens so helpful,, if not embarrassing.
A quick grooming lick, the camera clicking away doesn’t alarm her.
Penny, mildly interested, and seemingly saying ‘go away’.
The Potato Chip Gene
I like potato chips.
It runs in my family.
The potato chip gene is passed down
To one of us randomly.
Some brands are better
But I prefer Lays
Just the original chips except for BBQ
For those I like Jays.
I try not to eat them.
They are bad for my health.
If you want to tempt me
I’ll take chips over wealth.
Chips are addicting
I have that weird gene.
I crave them often
I am the chip queen.
No crunching around me
It hurts my chip brain.
Existing with such limits
Is causing much pain.
I need a pill or a potion.
To end my chip habit.
Until then I’ll try to eat carrots.
And make like a rabbit.
I know that this poem
Sounds a bit lame
But, my rhyming is off
The chip gene is to blame.
Copyright © Jamie Nowinski and Grandmother Wisdom/ Grandmother Musings 2012-2013. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Jamie Nowinski – Grandmother Wisdom/Grandmother Musings with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Weekend Plans to Make You Smile
It it a big weekend on the comedy stage.
Laughter and hilarity are the costumes they wear.
Audience participation is how they will gauge.
As the Improv ensues- Come out if you dare!
There will be games and music for all to enjoy.
Vendors, carts, and stands full of food.
A karaoke band to help sing out your joy.
On a hot, summer night, this will lighten the mood.
This is a carnival of medium proportion
With jesters and quartets of some fame.
No cover charge or any such notion
Spend your dollars on goodies and games.
A once a year kind of deal.
Bring the whole family to see.
It does not matter how low you feel
For the good times will make you happy.
Copyright © Jamie Nowinski and Grandmother Wisdom/ Grandmother Musings 2012-2013. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Jamie Nowinski – Grandmother Wisdom/Grandmother Musings with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
