I remember, as a child, when I thought my cousin “had it all.” OK. Let’s say it for what it was: the green-eyed monster. I used to look around my world and think, Everyone has such a perfect life.…

until my mother saw that I was beating myself up with this attitude. She sat me down firmly and said, “Everyone has something.”

To tell you the truth, I didn’t believe her. After all, G.’s life looked pretty darned good to me. As I got older, of course, I came to realize the wisdom of her words. I was looking at the outside, the surface things. And while those might look good, they’re certainly not everything.

This was in the early stages of my having epilepsy, and I admit that I was in an Oh, poor me kind of mood. But my mom’s words began to sink in, and I’ve heard them in my mind over and over and over. She has been gone for 17 years now, and I hear them still.

Yes, everyone does have something, be it a physical, emotional or psychological challenge, an employment difficulty, a financial burden, parenting stresses…whatever. No one slides through this world without challenges.

I tend to wrap myself up in a ball of pity too often, and those parties are lonely. So now I look at people in different ways. If someone says something negative to me, rather than wondering what I did or said to deserve it, I think, instead: What is the reason that this person needs to say this? What is their inner motivation to hurt? They must be hurting, themselves. And perhaps there’s something I might do to assuage that hurt.

So today, any old Monday, I am thinking about my mom, and I thank her for giving me some of the best words I have ever heard. They have helped me manage some extremely stressful situations.

Thanks, Mom. I love you.